When All Other Lights Go Out
by Dawn N
Summary: This story picks up in the final minutes of the season 7 finale, "Survival of the Fittest," and goes on from there as Dean and Sam struggle to find one another. This will become AU once season 8 begins. ** NOW COMPLETE **
1. Exile

**Disclaimer:** The characters of "Supernatural" were created by Eric Kripke and are owned by the CW Network. No profit is being made.

Story title was inspired from a line in the _Lord of the Rings: the Fellowship of the Ring_

The story picks up in the final minutes of the season 7 finale "Survival of the Fittest" and goes from there. This will be AU once the season starts but I had to do something to fill the Hellatus until the season 8 premiere on October 3, 2012. This will be a chapter story.

**Side Note:** I may incorporate various spoilers for season 8 as they leak out, so they may be weaved into this story, as well. Also, I picked the location of where Dean and Castiel ended up after the explosion based on the way Dante wrote in the "Divine Comedy" because his description of Ante-Purgatory sounds a lot like the environment Dean and Castiel were standing in at season 7's end.

**Happy reading, I hope!**

**When All Other Lights Go Out**

**Chapter 1: Exile**

By Dawn Nyberg

"_If there's no one beside you when your soul embarks, then I'll follow you into the dark,_ _I will follow you into the dark" _~lyrics excerpt from Death Cab for Cutie, _I Will Follow You into the Dark_

"Where's Dean?" Sam barked at Crowley, his eyes panicked.

Crowley smirked at the youngest Winchester enjoying the panic in the young man's face and the desperate sound behind the demanded question. "That bone has a bit of a kick … God weapons often do. You should pout a warning on the box," he quipped.

"Where are they Crowley," Sam shouted in response. He was tired of the demon's attitude. He needed to know what happened to Dean, to Castiel and the sheer lack of knowledge as to his brother's whereabouts was making the bile churn in Sam's stomach.

"Can't help you Sam," Crowley answered easily with a glint in his eye. He was clearly enjoying the situation. He quickly took Kevin as he directed two of his demons to take the young man. Sam watched them take him and turn back to Crowley, "sorry, Sam, the prophet is mine. You got what you wanted, Dick's dead … save the world, so I want one little prophet.

Sam looked desperate and Crowley could almost taste the angst coming from the young man like a good aged whiskey, "sorry moose, wish I could help you. You certainly got a lot on your plate right now. Looks like you are well and truly on your own," and with that he was gone leaving Sam standing in the empty lab at Sucrocorp splashed with the black blood of Dick Roman's demise. Sam stood there the final words of Crowley sinking in as he looked around. His panic and desperation climbing at the realization that the demon was right, he was alone, completely alone.

"Dean?" his voice a whisper as he said his brother's name to the empty lab while looking for some hint toward what happened to Dean.

"Wake up," the demand was even-toned but brooked no argument. Dean opened his eyes to a dark landscape. "Good, we need to get out of here," Castiel spoke as Dean got on his feet looking around.

"Where are we?"

"You don't know?" Castiel watches Dean's confused face.

"Last I remember we ganked Dick," he answered bluntly.

"And, where would he go in death?" Castiel watched the realization of their situation wash over Dean's face.

"What? Are you tellin' me …"

"Every soul here is a monster. This is where they come to pray on each other for all eternity." Castiel confirmed.

"We're in Purgatory? How do we get out?" Dean cast nervous tense eyes around looking into the deep shadows of the woods surrounding him and Cas as he looked back at the fallen angel for a solution.

"I'm afraid we're more likely to be ripped to shreds," his tone matter of fact. Dean's eyes shifted back to the sounds of the woods. He could here the creatures around them and turned back to Castiel.

"Cas, I think we better …" his statement died on his lips when he turned fully around only to discover Castiel had left him alone in the marshy woods. He turned slowly back around toward the noises surrounding him. He could see dark shadows of creatures; some crouched and surrounding him while others appeared to the run the perimeter. Red eyes peered at him through the woods and thicket. There was a dull light almost like moonlight coming from somewhere and it cast off the dark marshy waters a few steps away. Dean watched the shadows draw closer, heard the growls, saw the piercing red eyes never wavering from him. He let a breath out, "Oh, shit," … _yeah_, he thought, _that about sums it up_.

There was a rush of movement from his side and Dean turned toward the hairless, gangly creature that was running full tilt at him from the woods. In the dim light of Purgatory the creature looked like a Wendigo but ran on all fours like a dog, however, where it lacked in muscle it made up for in size. It was slightly larger than a hellhound. The snarling mouth opened wide as it leaped for Dean. The hunter went to dodge the attack but the creature never made it to him. He heard an animalistic scream from the animal and then silence. Dean looked up toward where the creature should have been but saw Castiel there instead tossing the now limp creature aside. "Cas?"

"We need to go," Cas reached down and before Dean could say another word Castiel removed him from the killing field.

He and Cas had been sitting in mostly silence for the better part of a couple hours Dean guessed since he had yelled at Castiel for leaving him but calmed down when the angel had merely left to see if he could locate Sam here. Dean was only partially relieved that his little brother wasn't here, but also worried that he wasn't. At least if he were here he could keep an eye on his sibling, but instead he was left with the knowledge that his brother was left holding the bag in the middle of Leviathan central. He chewed his bottom lip absently as he worried that his brother could have been hurt or killed when Dick blew up. Dean hunched toward the small fire, "man, who would have figured Purgatory would be on the cold side."

"Ante-Purgatory," Cas corrected.

"Huh?" Dean's face looked confused.

"This place is Ante-Purgatory that is Purgatory," Castiel pointed across the reed-grown seashore of sorts toward a large mountain.

"What you talkin' about Willis," Dean quipped and just shook his head at the fact his angel friend was just as dense as he always was with humor and pop culture sayings. "Different Strokes …" when Castiel still looked confused Dean added, "It's a TV show from the 80's man," he paused and shook his head, "never mind." Dean replied with frustration. "So, that mountain lookin' thing is Purgatory, how we gettin' there?"

"It won't be easy." Castiel responded flatly.

"Just pop us up there Cas, like you did in the woods … you know do your angel thing. Look you already said you can't zap us out of here but you can get around inside, right?"

"My powers are limited here … this place wasn't meant for angels or man." Dean looked serious for a moment then a bittersweet look of memory crossed his face.

"Yeah, Bobby said this place was like 'the backside of your worst nightmares. It's all blood and bone and darkness … filled with the bodies and souls of all things hungry, sharp and nasty.'"

"You still mourn for him," Castiel's voice was soft and the understanding tone had Dean looking at him. He sounded like the old Cas before he took on Sam's crazy. "He was a good man."

"Cas," Dean looked at the angel with hope.

"Sleep, you need the rest. We will make our way to Purgatory tomorrow. I'll keep watch," he turned his back and Dean said nothing else. They were in a rock-like alcove that overlooked a vast plain a small fire to keep the chill at bay but the small flames were blocked by a small rock out cropping hiding the light from anything that might see it below. Dean eased back and closed his eyes, not really sleeping but trying to just be still for a moment. "I'm sure he is okay." Castiel said suddenly. Dean raised his head.

"Who?" Dean confused by the sudden sentence.

"Sam," Castiel cast a look over his shoulder toward Dean.

"Yeah," Dean's replied but he still felt hollow. He wouldn't relax until he could see his little brother with his own eyes. "But, you're sure he's not here somewhere, right?"

"I promise you he is not," Castiel assured as he met Dean's eyes. The young hunter had a sudden thought and sat all the way forward.

"Cas, you say tomorrow but is it tomorrow?" Castiel looked confused by the question. Dean huffed a breath, "I mean when I was in Hell it felt like forty years but for Sammy it was four months. Is tomorrow really tomorrow?"

The angel turned and looked at Dean, and by the look in his eyes Dean knew and his stomach dropped. "Just say it," Dean's voice was tight.

"It moves differently here than in Hell or the Earthly plain," Castiel offered without a lot of elaboration.

"O-kay," Dean drew the word out a bit. "How much?"

"It's hard to say," Cas replied. "What may feel like a day or two here will be closer to a week possibly two for Sam."

"Dammit, so you're saying that down here I'm on the better end of the deal compared to Sam? You're saying that if it takes us very long to get out of here I'm hanging Sammy out to dry, right?"

"I'm sure he doesn't see it that way Dean. I suspect your brother will turn over every stone to find you."

"Yeah, and where has that got him in the past? Screw sleep, we gotta get the hell out of here, man." Dean made a move to stand.

"It is no use … you're exhausted and you will be no good to your brother if you get yourself shredded to pieces. Your body needs the rest after the trip to get here when you killed Dick Roman."

Dean went to argue but Castiel silenced his words when he stood up walked over to Dean and said nothing. Dean couldn't figure out what he was doing. Castiel crouched down and leaned in and Dean promptly leaned back, "Ah, remember what I said about personal space Cas?"

The angel actually smirked and before Dean knew what he was doing he touched Dean's forehead putting him to sleep instantly. "Sleep," Cas said quietly and stood up returning to his quiet sentry duty.

Jodie Mills wiped her hands on the kitchen towel and leaned back looking into her dining room at Sam hunched over his laptop. Her lips thinned at the dark circles under his eyes and the angry black and blue bruising that ran down the side of his face. He'd had a confrontation with a leviathan on his way out of Sucrocorp. The diagnosis was given by a good friend of hers that owed her a favor. He had said that Sam had a mild concussion and bruising but no broken facial bones. Sam had shown up three days ago running on empty and he hadn't really rested at all since coming to her. He had explained to her what happened and that Dean and Castiel were 'just gone' and he was looking for answers. She was glad she now lived at the edge of town and had shortly after her husband and son died when she decided she couldn't live in their house anymore. She got a place with a little over an acre of land on the edge of town which garnered her some privacy which just happened to allow Sam to stay without drawing notice. The teapot whistled and she walked over to it and poured the steaming water over the chamomile tea bag and took it into the dining room.

Sam's eyes slid toward the mug, "I'm good Sheriff Mills," he replied and returned to the laptop. Her hand closed the laptop and Sam's eyes shot up toward her.

"First, it's Jodie and second you're not good not by a long shot," her voice brooked no argument. "Now, drink the damn tea. I'm not afraid to break out the mom voice if I have to young man," she smirked at him but he knew she was serious. He dropped his eyes and reached for the mug.

"Thanks, Jodie."

"Now, when you're done drinking that I want you to go upstairs take a hot shower and go to bed," and when it looked like Sam was about to protest she leveled a look, "no but's Sam. You look like death warmed over, finish your tea and go upstairs the Internet will still be waiting for you in the morning … after 9:00 preferably," she smiled softly at his slight nod and gently squeezed his shoulder.

She sat with him until he had drained the mug dry and watched him go up the stairs toward his bathroom and bedroom. He looked like he carried the burden of the world on his shoulders. Her mind wondered to thoughts of Dean and prayed for his safe return from wherever he may be.

**To Be Continued ….**


	2. Carry the Fire

**Disclaimer:** The characters of "Supernatural" were created by Eric Kripke and are owned by the CW Network. No profit is being made.

**Note to Readers:** I'm going to try and update each weekend, but my schedule sometimes makes it difficult. However, I'll make an effort to never go more than 1 week without posting a new chapter. I'm not sure how long this fic is going to be in the end, but it will be complete before the season 8 premiere. I know some readers are awaiting the angst and hurt comfort that I often do in all of my SPN fics, it's coming, yet, the story needs a little time to develop, but it is coming.

In lieu, of recent Comic Con S8 spoilers – some will be incorporated to some degree, however based on Comic Con spoilers my fic direction is already AU.

Thank you for the reviews! Also, for all of those reviewers that didn't sign in, so I couldn't thank you personally with a DM … thanks for reading and reviewing! It's so very appreciated. I have been having a lot of trouble signing into FF . net , so if new chapter postings seemed delayed that could be the reason, if not my schedule. It took 22 times of trying to sign in for this finally let me. The security code was always saying it was wrong.

**Side Note:** story arc set-up and various notes are at the start of chapter 1. Also, this chapter's title comes from the new CD released by the group Delta Rae and the title felt right.

**Happy Reading, I hope!**

**When All Other Lights Go Out**

**Chapter 2: Carry the Fire**

By Dawn Nyberg

"_Here's to you when the rain hits too hard. When the battles that you fight just leave you scarred. When you're tired to the bone, and you've got no strength to move on … here's to you …"_ ~ Mathew Perryman Jones, _Homage to the Suffering_

"Sam," Jodie's voice was soft as she sat down across from him at her table, "it's been two months, maybe…" she didn't want to think that Dean could be dead but there had been no word, no clue's and Sam still c alled contacts and searched the Internet and old books from storage that were Bobby's.

"No," Sam snapped and stood up pacing the small kitchen like a caged animal. "I'll figure this out, okay? I can find him. He's out there somewhere I just know it." Sam's voice was sure.

"Sam, I've called in favors, run searches at the station. None of the John Doe's have panned out at hospitals nationwide. The way you described what happed at that factory when Dean killed Roman … the energy explosion, it's possible …"

"No, he's alive," Sam's voice low as he looked out the kitchen window to the backyard. "I'm just missing something. There's no way he's dead." He felt a hand fall gently on his shoulder.

"Are you sure about that? You said he was right there with Roman when he blew and Castiel, too. Isn't there a chance that…"

"Jodie, I know it looks bad, okay? Maybe hopeless, but I know they're alive, I know it."

"You sure you're not just denying the possibility?"

Sam shook his head silently and went back to staring out the window. "Sam, I don't want this to mean he's gone either but don't you think if he were," she left it unsaid but Sam knew she meant 'if Dean were alive wouldn't he have found a way to Sam, yet?' Jodie looked at Sam and could see how lost he looked, his eyes hollow with sadness, fear and desperation. She turned from Sam and went back to the small breakfast nook table and sat down drinking from her coffee mug. "I'm just glad that sonofabitch Dick Roman is rotting in Hell," she mumbled to herself.

"Purgatory," Sam corrected absently and he fingered the coffee mug next to his hand on the counter.

"Huh?" Jodie looked at Sam in curiosity.

"When Dean killed him he would have gone back to Purgatory not Hell … monsters go to Purgatory … Hell is for demons and human souls, mostly, but monsters go to Purgatory." Jodie watched Sam a second and saw the moment of clarity like a light had finally chased the shadow away and he could see. "Dammit!" he shouted. "That's it," he was a flurry of movement then and Jodie stood up.

"What? What's it?" She watched Sam as he practically ran toward a box of books on the dining room table. "Sam what is it?"

Sam was digging with frenzied need into the book looking for the old leather tome, "it's in here somewhere, dammit, where is it? Shit, Bobby had so many books; I know it was this box."

"Sam, what are you looking for… what's happening?"

"I know where Dean is … I can't believe I didn't even think of it before now; he's so going to call me a stupid ass for this one."

"What? Where is he?"

"Purgatory," Sam answered as he continued to remove books from the deep box. "When Dick blew up Dean and Cas were too close they had to have been caught up in that energy wave. They're in Purgatory. Bobby had a book with rituals and information to access the place. I know I saw it."

"That place is full of monster, right?" Jodie asked her mind already wondering if Dean could possibly survive for two months in a place where he most likely had a hand in putting a lot of the population in there. He was the proverbial cop sentenced to a maximum security prison and put in the general population. That usually equaled dead pretty quick or at least having your ass beat to within an inch of your life. Sam seemed to know her train of thought. He looked at her and shook his head.

"He's alive Jodie, I know it. Dean would survive no matter what. I know it." His eyes spotted the dusty book and grabbed at it like a life preserver. "Now, I just gotta find something that doesn't involve a damn eclipse and other crap like the last time," Sam mumbled to himself as he started looking through the dusty tome.

"Okay, so were screwed Cas," Dean hissed under his breath as they hid under a rocky outcropping near the base of the mountain.

"Perhaps, not," Castiel responded under his breath. Dean just leveled a look at the angel in disbelief.

"You're kidding, right? Are you that out of touch with the crap cake we've been handed dude?" Castiel looked confused.

"We've had no cake Dean," Castiel's tone was matter of fact. Dean just rolled his eyes in frustration.

"Figure of speech, man. So, the mountain isn't panning out, so how we getting' the hell out of here, huh?"

"I can investigate the very top plateaus and return to you."

"How long will that take? Your angel mojo isn't always firing on all eight cylinders down here Cas. You know what happened the last time you tried to zap us somewhere here…" Dean looked at the angel.

"It was an unfortunate situation …" Dean just stared at Castiel with a stupefied look on his face. His memory was still fresh from over a few days ago or at least a few days ago to him. Cas had zapped them to a higher plateau and they had ended up running into a couple wendigos and werewolves having a territory fight and adding an angel and a human to the mix had proved both bloody and a royal crap fest. Castiel wasn't able to zap them away, so they had had to fight their way to a safe spot. Dean had been clawed but luckily angel mojo problems aside Cas was still able to heal Dean.

"What if you don't come back?"

"I will return for you Dean," Castiel paused. "If I am able," he added. "If I am injured, as you know I cannot be killed here, so I will survive no matter what."

"Yeah, whatever man, do what you gotta do."

"If you find yourself in trouble call out to me and I will hear you Dean."

Dean nodded. "Look while you're on your little Mission Impossible I think I'm gonna look around. You said there are gates and doors here, right, maybe…"

"They are few and far between Dean and watched, but it is all rumor as I have explained in Heaven we only knew stories and rumors of this place. Our Father made this place for the beasts and the Leviathans."

"Yeah, yeah, go okay?" Cas nodded and was gone. Dean was alone and his mind went to his little brother and he said a silent prayer that Sam was alive and okay. "I'm comin' Sammy, just give big brother time to figure this one out, okay?" he whispered to himself.

**To Be Continued**


	3. The Sound of Silence

**Disclaimer:** The characters of "Supernatural" were created by Eric Kripke and are owned by the CW Network. No profit is being made.

**Note to Readers: **Sorry, this update is late but my schedule has been crazy. I will make an effort to write a longer chapter for the next post. Again, than you for the reviews and PM's they are all appreciated!

**Side Note:** Just a reminder I am working some spoilers and/or casting news for season 8 into this story but it is still AU since the announcements from Comic Con have mentioned S8 details that verge away from my ideas for this story.

Happy Reading, I hope!

**When All Other Lights Go Out**

**Chapter 3: The Sound of Silence**

By Dawn Nyberg

"_Hello darkness, my old friend, I've come to talk with you again, because a vision softly creeping, left its seeds while I was sleeping, and the vision that was planted in my brain still remains within the sound of silence …"_ ~ Simon and Garfunkel, _The Sound of Silence_

Days weren't that easy to keep track of in Purgatory and Dean knew that the passage of time here was shorter than topside but he was sure it had been a couple days since Castiel had left. He was tempted to call him back but he was holding his own and branching out further each day looking for a way out and then that's when he saw it … a door. It was guarded by two dark forms that reminded him of his brother's hidden _Lord of the Rings_ books, the ones he'd actually read when he thought Sam was dead and locked in the cage. He'd watched the movies with Ben and Lisa and he'd have to say that the two creatures guarding the doors looked a lot like the black cloaked Wraith figures that hunted the ring. A smile crept at the edges of his mouth when he thought that he'd never told his brother that he'd found the stashed books in his belongings, a bag shoved in a recess of the trunk out of the way. He had an overwhelming urge to make a run for the door; after all, it had to be a way out. Otherwise, it wouldn't be guarded, right?

His muscles bunched against what his rational brain was yelling, 'don't do it ya dumb ass' but when did Dean ever listen to himself, huh? He began to move and a hand grasped his shoulder tightly and low growl of a voice at the back of his ear whispered, "I wouldn't do that if I were you." An arm came around and pulled him back into the shadows and away from the wraiths. Dean wanted to fight but knew it would only draw the attention of the creatures, so he prepared to fight once the arm let go and they were out of sight from the wariths. The arm released and Dean spun around ready to defend himself. "Chill," a man stood in front of him, a very human looking man.

"What the hell," Dean hissed. "Who the hell are you?" he paused. "What the hell are you?"

"The name's Benny," he answered easily. "And, going one on one with a couple of wraiths is a real short bus move."

"I asked you a question," Dean's voice was all business. "This ain't a place for humans, so what are you?"

"I could ask you what you are, too," the mystery man replied with ease.

"You know I'm human, so cut the crap," Dean hissed. The man smirked.

"Yeah, I can smell your blood, but lucky for you the wind wasn't blowing in their direction, otherwise those wraiths would have made pâté out of your bone marrow."

"Screw you, I know what I'm doing," Dean replied, his jaw muscles tight.

"Yeah, right? Where's that tree-topper friend of yours? Still lookin' for a way out on that mountain?"

"Yeah, and I call him back here and you're toast. So, what? You've been watching us?"

"Your feathered-friend won't get reception up there anyway, so you're on your own kiddo. Oh, and I've been watching since you got here … figured you'd last five minutes but color me surprised you're still alive … hunter, right? Dean leveled a hard look at the man in front of him.

"Blood-sucker, right?"

"Well, we all have our crosses to bear, don't we?" Dean started to say something but the vampire put a hand up, "look, the way I see things we both want out of this crap hole, right? That's not the only door out of here, I found another one a while ago but it's a two man job … what do you say?"

Sam stood in front of the large door and his memories flashed back to the last time he stood in front of it … the last time his big brother had been by his side. There wasn't any other way he had to come and ask for the help. Jodie had begged him not to go and had even offered to follow him here for back-up but he didn't want her hurt. The old tome had turned up an alternative way to get into Purgatory that didn't require an eclipse or virgin blood. However, one standard seemed unalterable and that was the blood of a Purgatory native. He only knew of one that he could contact and just hoped he didn't end up dead or worse … he stopped thinking about the what-ifs and knew he had to do this because it was his one hope to get Dean back and his brother had already been gone for six months. His mind briefly lamenting that fact and hoping that it didn't feel that long to his brother. Dean was coming home and there was no other alternative. He raised his hand and knocked.

"It's where?" Dean barked when Benny told him where they were headed.

"I've told you twice now and why don't you keep your voice down before you draw in everything out there."

"I'm not that loud," Dean interjected.

"No, but human scent causes a frenzy down here like blood in the water to sharks. You flappin' your mouth only gives them a sound to zero in on."

"You're talkin'" the vampire rolled his eyes.

"This is a whisper and believe me they could care less about my scent when I'm near you … and who do you think they'll go for and make a snack out of first?" Dean hated this unsavory partnership but if it got him out of this place and topside again to find Sammy, so be it. He'd tried calling for Cas but he'd never shown. He still whispered his name and even prayed for him every now and again but still no Castiel. "So?" Benny looked at Dean.

"Yeah, whatever, let's get there already. I'd still like to know how you expect us to get through that valley of …" he paused. "What'd you call it?"

"The Valley of Nex," Benny huffed out in frustration. "And, we get through it by being smarter than the hunters."

"Hunters? What are we?"

"Prey," Benny said in a matter of fact tone and moved ahead. Dean shook his head and muttered to himself.

"I just had to ask…" Dean silently berated himself.

The door opened and a man looked at Sam with hard eyes. Sam nodded as he lifted his hands and moved slowly in a circle. "No weapons … I just need to talk to him."

A voice echoed from behind the man, "need is a much better word than want, let the boy pass." Sam was escorted through the ornate foyer toward a wooden door left cracked open as light seeped through. Sam met eyes with his only hope to get to Dean and just hoped he mad it out of here alive.

"I was sure we'd cross paths again Sam, but admittedly this is much sooner than I had anticipated," he had the same knowing smile that made Sam uneasy and eyes that seemed to look into him. His slight smile said a thousand words that told Sam he knew quite well he was only here because he needed help. "Sit down," the voice was even toned but brooked no argument and Sam dropped into a seat.

**To Be Continued **


	4. Pitiless as the Sun

**Disclaimer:** The characters of "Supernatural" were created by Eric Kripke and are owned by the CW Network. No profit is being made.

**Note to Readers: **Thank you for the reviews and PM's, they are appreciated! My schedule is so bad lately. I feel bad that an update doesn't come every weekend, although I plan to get one done it doesn't always happen, my apologies. I'm thankful for your patience. I will try to have a post ready for next weekend sometime, I'll try. But, I'll post this chapter a little early since I wasn't able to do anything last weekend.

**Side Note: **The title of this chapter is from a Yeats poem, "The Second Coming"

Happy Reading, I hope!

**When All Other Lights Go Out**

**Chapter 4: Pitiless as the Sun**

By Dawn Nyberg

"… _It's a long way down, a long way down – the wolves will chase you by the pale moonlight, drunk and driven by a devil's hunger…"_ ~ Delta Rae, _Bottom of the River_

"Well, I must give credit where credit is due … your brother must have been very close to Roman when he killed him in order to be swept up in his descent into Purgatory, quite impressive for a human."

"He was face to face when he killed the bastard," Sam answered his voice low but held pride for his brother's strength.

"What do you want of me Sam?" the Alpha Vampire offered a slight smile. "I can't help you, not that I would, if I could."

"You have something I need," Sam looked at the Alpha vampire and dropped his eyes to his hands folded on the table.

"You cannot recreate the ritual that was used by your angel and that irritating demon Crowley … you're lacking an eclipse, virgin blood and…"

Sam interrupted, "I know, I found another way but it requires one element that seems a common link…"

"Blood of a native, I suspect," the Alpha Vampire concluded.

"Yes."

"I have bled once for you Winchesters already … why would I again?"

"If Dean hadn't taken out Roman, his Leviathan plague would still be killing your children. He would be killing off the entire vampire race," Sam offered. "He saved your race."

The old vampire laughed loud and deep, "it wasn't his goal Sam, but at the time we both had a vested interest in seeing Roman dead. Your brother was not thinking of my kind."

"True, but he did kill Roman which left the surviving Leviathan to crawl off somewhere with no leader." Sam paused and took a breath, "Please…" he said it quietly but with desperation. There was a long pause where nothing was said by either party and then the Alpha sighed.

"Sam, what makes you think he is still alive? You must understand that Purgatory was never meant for humans. The souls of Purgatory will be drawn to him like moths to a flame and they will rip him apart." The words weren't said with malice just matter of fact.

"He's alive, I know it. I just need the key and it's your blood."

The vampire sat appraising Sam with knowing eyes, "you're different than when we first met. Do you remember the very first time?" Sam nodded.

"You were the perfect animal Samuel," he practically cooed.

"I didn't have a soul."

"True, but you were perfect …"

"I was a human monster," Sam answered quietly. He didn't like to spark memories of things he did without a soul.

"You weren't a monster Sam, just a human with a splendid utility function," the Alpha Vamp smiled. Sam decided not to say anything about that comment.

"The blood, yours, I need it, please, it's the only way in and out of there." Sam's eyes pleaded. He didn't mind letting his desperation and vulnerability show. He needed help and this was the only way.

"Well, I imagine if you aren't accessing a portal like your angel used then you must have found one of the gates." Sam looked at him and wondered if the vampire was a mind reader. "There are only two gates into purgatory and one is far from your reach in Europe, high up in a mountain range. But, the other …"

"In southern Wyoming, an old cemetery" Sam looked at the Alpha, his eyes resolute. The vampire smiled.

"You'd return to your old stomping ground." Sam started and looked at the ancient vampire with shock. The Alpha chuckled, "you think I don't know just about all there is for me to know about you and your brother? Of course, I know about the deal he made to save you, sold his soul for you. I know about the Hell's gate being opened by the Colt. I also, know that there is a gate to purgatory at the far edge of that same cemetery, long forgotten by time. You'd risk your small human life to walk into purgatory to find your brother?"

"I'd risk everything," Sam's jaw was firm and his stare unwavering.

"Why?" The Alpha studied Sam and could hear his heart beating evenly; there was no lie behind his affirmation.

"He's my brother," it was a simple statement but one that oddly the ancient vampire admired and respected.

"Do you even know what you're looking for?" he questioned.

"The text I found said it was in that cemetery, but hidden … it mentioned something about three steps that led to the door and there was a drawing," Sam reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of Xerox paper and opened it up. "I copied this from what was in the book. The text said the blood of a purgatory native or the way I understand it, anything that belongs in purgatory. The blood goes in this little recess carved in the stone a few drops. It's the lock to the door and the blood is the key."

The Alpha vamp looked at the paper and slid it back to Sam, "and what do you suspect this is Samuel?" The vampire pointed to a sharp piece of stone that jutted from the wall above the flat stone with the recess in the middle of it. Sam looked at the almost blade like protrusion from the wall, he had noticed it before in the original drawing.

"To cut yourself, I guess, just to get the blood, but I wouldn't need to use it," Sam answered logically. "I can pour some of your blood from a vial into that hole and keep the rest to get back out with Dean. Please, can I have your blood? Dean's running out of time."

"You may have it …"

"Thanks," Sam interrupted.

"Let me continue boy," the ancient Alpha said in frustration.

"Sorry," Sam dropped his eyes a moment.

"My blood being poured from a vial will not work … there is a purpose for that stone blade in the wall … think," the Alpha encouraged. Sam studied the vampire and then his eyes widened.

"It has to be fresh," he said bluntly.

"Yes, and fresh to get back out there is a similar lock on the other side of the door. These gates were built for Alphas, the first of a species to come and go from purgatory, but also a progeny from an Alpha can have access but only a direct progeny."

"You mean a vampire created from your blood or bite and not by some other non-Alpha vamp," Sam reasoned. "It's not like I'm going to find a vampire turned directly by you or any other kind of purgatory Alpha willing to help me …"

"No, but you can thank your grandfather and Crowley for killing all the Alphas. Of course, with the exception of a couple beyond myself and they are not even on this continent."

Sam looked deflated and knew there was no way the Alpha was going to go to Wyoming with him.

Dean huffed out a breath, "screw you, I had that bitch. I could have handled it."

"Yeah, you could have but you forgot your back, stupid human," Benny groused. It went against his every instinct to help this man. He wanted to bleed him dry but he needed his help to get out of this hole. "I need your ass alive to get out of here. So, you make a kill but you forget attacks can come from all direction here."

"Whatever," Dean complained. He knew Benny was right, he should have positioned himself better when he was going for the Harpy and in his desire to see her dead he forgot that even though Benny was taking down another, harpies always traveled in threes.

"Now, come on," Benny said low, almost a growl. Dean just flipped him off and walked forward. The Valley of Nex, royally sucked.

The ancient vampire looked at the young Winchester and could see his hope diminish. He didn't feel that he owed the Winchesters but they had taken Roman out of the picture, perhaps this one final payment, for stopping the plague. He sighed and folded his arms on the table in front of him, "there is one way," the Alpha offered. "Do you still have your grandfather's journal, the Campbell family one?"

"Yeah, why?" Sam wasn't sure where the Alpha was going with this question. He'd read his grandfather's journal and the Campbell family journal and he didn't recall anything about getting in and out of purgatory, but he was willing to listen, this was Dean's life and nothing else mattered to him … he had to save Dean.

**To Be Continued**


	5. Sanguis

**Disclaimer:** The characters of "Supernatural" were created by Eric Kripke and are owned by the CW Network. No profit is being made.

**Note to Readers: **Many thanks for the review and PM's. Also, thank you to all the readers that leave reviews as a 'guest' and don't sign in. I'm not able to thank you by PM, but I'd like to thank you for reading and reviewing, it's appreciated! I wish I could post every weekend but it doesn't always work out that way. I broke my finger a couple weeks ago, so typing was an issue but I think I have the swing of things, so hopefully no more delays.

I will have this story finished before the season 8 premiere on October 3 and if I can manage it with my schedule I hope to be done by September 30.

Happy Reading, I hope!

**When All Other Lights Go Out**

**Chapter 5: Sanguis**

By Dawn Nyberg

"_He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you" _~ Friedrich Nietzsche

"You're not serious," Sam's look was incredulous as he looked at the Alpha Vamp. The vampire merely smirked and lifted a shoulder in a half shrug.

"At least, I'm offering you a solution to getting in boy and that journal offers you a way back out so to speak … sometimes you have to introduce the serpent into the garden to save it."

Sam looked hard at the ancient vampire and said nothing for a long beat and then shook his head. "I can't … I…"

"There is no other way you're getting in that door," the Alpha confirmed.

"You're not biting me," Sam asserted, his voice sure but his eyes were desperate betraying his heart.

"No, that is not my proposal," the Alpha began. "You misunderstand, I offer you my blood not my bite. I'm not sure why I feel compelled to be fully truthful, but your blood, I can smell it from here. It's an interesting cocktail I must say … in fact, once I began drinking you, I'm not sure I could stop."

"I don't get it," Sam decided to not address the 'cocktail' the vampire smelled, he knew it was the demon blood. It would always be apart of him no matter what. "You said the blood had to be fresh to work. What? Now it doesn't?"

The Alpha shook his head ever so slightly, "You might mind your tone boy," he reprimanded lightly but without much heat. Sam dropped his eyes a moment, an act of contrition and the ancient vampire seemed to accept that gesture. "I offer you my blood to drink when you are ready to do so. As you know from experience, watching your brother turned in that alley … it only takes a few drops. Drink of my blood when you are ready and save the rest for your family's cure," he paused. "Unless, of course you decide you like it and choose to …"

"I wouldn't," Sam answered his heart aching at the memory of allowing his brother to be turned when he had no soul. There was a long moment and internal struggle and finally his eyes lifted up and met the Alpha's. The vampire smiled smoothly at him knowing the boy's decision. "No strings?"

"No, but this will be the last favor I offer you or your brother. This is final payment for killing Roman and sending him back to purgatory. Are we clear Sam?"

Sam nodded. The vampire shook his head, "Say it."

"We're clear."

The vampire pushed his seat back and walked to a corner of the dining room and opened a cabinet to a butler's pantry of sorts. It was very ornate and Sam guesses it was worth a small fortune. He heard the movement of glass inside and the Alpha stepped back with a glass container. It was clear but the lid was a pretty iridescent blue. He pulled the top of with a pop checking the seal. "This should work nicely. So, tell me how much blood do you need for your cure?" The Alpha walked back to his seat and sat down.

Sam thought back to when his grandfather mixed up the cure for Dean it wasn't a huge amount a couple ounces were mixed with the other ingredients. "Not much, it looked like a couple ounces." The vampire nodded and Sam watched a long finger nail extend out and he deftly slit his wrist and bled into the glass container filling almost to the top stopping when it neared within an inch of the lid lip. He pushed in the lid and heard a quiet pop noise as the seal engaged. He tilted the bottle upside down testing the seal and there was no blood escaping. He reached out and placed the container down inches from Sam's hand. He gave it a slight push, "this should be adequate for your needs."

Sam hesitated only a second and took the vampire's words as permission to take possession of the container. He nodded his thanks but said nothing. He wanted to leave, to run actually but he sat and looked at the Alpha, "may I go now."

The vampire smirked and then chuckled a bit, "you Winchester's may be brothers but I must admit Samuel you aren't quite as abrasive as your older brother. A little more civility in you, I see."

Sam bristled. "I don't mean that as an insult Sam, merely an observation," the Alpha asserted. Sam nodded. "You can go."

When Sam walked to the door to leave the dining room the vampire spoke, "be mindful of what purgatory holds Sam. It is my birthplace and although your progenitor will be an Alpha, my blood in your veins will garner you some reprieve it will only buy you so much. Be prepared to fight, to kill. You will be required to bleed to enter and exit through the gate unless a gatekeeper offers its blood for your exit." Sam looked at the vampire surprised for the words, the warning.

"I will."

"I trust if you and your brother survive we'll cross paths again one day, but the encounter will not be so amenable." Sam nodded and was gone.

He drove for two hours without stopping and finally pulled off on the shoulder in the middle of nowhere, some rural route running between farm fields. He picked up the container and looked at it for a moment then set it down. He got out his grandfather's journal and read over every inch of the recipe for the cure. There were a couple ingredients that he'd have to locate first. He had to prepare the cure before he went into purgatory.

Three hours later Sam had everything he needed for the cure the last ingredient was an herb called Sanguisorba which proved the hardest to come by but he had it now and that completed the list. The car turned onto the highway a short time later and he headed toward southern Wyoming and an old cowboy cemetery he hadn't been back to in a long time, one he thought he'd never see again. He wasn't ready to drink some of the blood, not yet. He remembered that Dean began the transition quickly, his senses and hunger were starting even before they had returned to their hotel room. He'd drink just not yet. There wasn't another option he had to save Dean. He decided to overlook one sentence in the journal, one he decided didn't matter not more than Dean, and he'd take his chances he decided as his eyes skimmed the words again: _the cure can offer salvation in death or release from the disease, but the alternative is not acceptable. _The cure could kill him, but it was an acceptable risk … he had to save Dean. He knew his brother would do it for him.

"Screw you," Dean hissed.

"Listen to me you two-legged cattle," Benny ground out. "I know more of the way of things than you do when it comes to this place. Now, isn't the time to go running out there in the wide open. Don't you see the wendigos are pack hunting those rawheads? It's going to be a blood bath and the further we are from it the better. We wait it out. I have no desire to be in such cramped quarters with you either but they cannot smell us here."

They were in a small alcove behind a rock and tall grass of sorts, but the grass was sharp and cut like a surgical scalpel if you ran into it. Dean huffed, flipped the vampire off and leaned back against the rock. An hour had gone by in tense silence with Benny and Dean finally asked, "so, these gatekeepers, do we kill them or what?"

"We need their blood to get out," Benny answered over his shoulder while he watched down below where the killing fields were in full swing. "These gates only open one of two ways…"

"Yeah, and…"

"The blood of an Alpha or being turned by an Alpha and the blood of a gatekeeper. Gatekeeper's are only able to open an exit to leave they have no sway on getting into purgatory."

"Why would anyone want in this shit hole?" Benny shrugged at Dean's words. "So, we need at least one of the gatekeeper's, huh?" Dean wagged an eyebrow.

"Yes, what did I just finish saying?" Benny said in frustration.

"So, you're not an Alpha or turned by one … you're just a regular Joe, run of the mill…" Dean's voice was cut off as Benny moved lightening fast and grabbed his throat pulling Dean close to him as he ground out a reply into Dean's ear.

"There is nothing regular about me you piece of hamburger. I will drain you dry slowly … do you know the pain of being bled slowly?" Dean's jaw tightened and he forced out an answer against the restraint on his throat.

"Yeah … actually I do … did a tour in hell," he forced out. Benny looked closely at him for a moment and released his hold on Dean's throat but stayed close his arm against Dean's chest holding his back pressed against a boulder. "So, you gonna gank me or what?" Before Benny could answer there was a commotion of movement behind them and a lone wendigo streaked toward them. Benny shoved Dean sideways as the wendigo slammed into the rock. Dean shoved back against the ground gaining distance and found his footing. He reached under the tall grass where there was a good ten inches of soft reed providing a hand-hold of sorts and yanked up keeping the razor like grass away from himself. Benny and the wendigo struck at each other and the vampire was knocked aside like a rag doll, the creature moved in on Dean but the hunter swung the grass at the monster slitting open his chest and causing a deep gouge across his stomach.

Benny was back up on his feet impressed with the human's ability. The wendigo staggered by the injury but did not fall. "Man, where's some damn fire when you need it," Dean complained as he swung at the creature again.

Benny leaped onto the back of the wendigo and with a powerful twist he ripped the creature's head off tossing it aside like a volleyball. Dean looked at the twitching body as Benny pushed it over an embankment that went away from the killing fields below. "Well, I guess that works, too," he said as he looked at the decapitated head and dropped the razor grass.

Benny looked out at the plateau below and surmised that the wendigo had come across them by accident as it fled from the battle. He watched as some wendigo's carried off their pray into the approaching darkness of night and the surviving rawhead's appeared to be taking some kills with them, as well.

"Just a deserter … they don't know we're up here. The darkness is coming we'll cross tomorrow the gate isn't far."

"I didn't know popping them off like a Pez-head would work … I'll have to remember that." Dean replied. Benny smirked as he walked over and picked up the head and tossed it far away.

"Using the grass was a good idea," Benny offered. "I hadn't thought of that as an option. You think on your feet … how bad are you cut?"

"Huh? I'm fine," Dean answered.

"I smell your blood." Benny answered flatly. Dean looked down and was surprised to see a very shallow cut, not long, a half an inch maybe, nothing more than a good paper cut really.

"You can smell this little cut?" Benny nodded. "Yeah, it's fine probably won't even be visible by morning." The vampire sat down on the ground and watched below.

"Good, we leave once the darkness is gone." Dean said nothing and took a seat. He'd called for Castiel the other day yet again and no luck … the angel never came. His mind was thinking of his little brother and getting back to him. Cas could take care of himself here, maybe even found a way out but couldn't get back in or something, Dean thought. His priority was Sam, always had been and always would be.

Sam had driven for almost two days and he'd walked into the cemetery after parking the car on a dirt road at the old railroad ties. He'd called Jodie and told her his plan in a round about way, but she was smart and figured it out. She'd read him the riot act, but in the end she had just said, _I'm here for you boys if you need me. You're strong enough to do this Sam just believe that. You got my number, if you or Dean needs me I'm just a call away, okay? You call me when it's over, you hear me?" _Sam smiled at the memory and hoped he and Dean were able to call her and let her know they were okay.

He'd mixed the recipe for the cure and put the mixture in another bottle. He'd found an old whiskey bottle in Dean's belongings. He'd rinsed it out and poured all the ingredients into it and given it a shake. It was ready and Sam put it safely in his bag near the purgatory gate. He wasn't taking it with him, too afraid it would be broken. Sam looked at the remnants of the bottle the Alpha had given him and there was a good swig left in the bottle for his taking. He looked at the old stone steps that led up to the gate but he did not walk up them instead he walked a few paces back to the door he remembered quite well, the Hell's gate and sat down by it. He'd already tried to drop a couple drops of blood on the locking mechanism of the Purgatory gate but nothing happened the Alpha was right it had to be fresh.

He looked out over the cemetery in the late afternoon sun, dusk would be approaching soon and he waited. There was no one around and he would be of no danger to anyone here as the transition began. Dean had been strong enough to resist feeding and Sam would have to be, too. Dean's life depended on this and he wouldn't let his brother down. He wanted to see the sunset and as the pinks and gold's of the Wyoming sky began to stretch over the cemetery Sam popped the top on the bottle. "Bottoms up," he said, his voice hollow even to his own ears. He raised the container and swallowed the blood of the Alpha vampire. He leaned back and waited.

**To Be Continued**


	6. The Bonds that Bind

**Disclaimer:** The characters of "Supernatural" were created by Eric Kripke and are owned by the CW Network. No profit is being made.

**Note to Readers: **Many thanks for the review and PM's. Also, thank you to all the readers that leave reviews as a 'guest' and don't sign in. I'm not able to thank you by PM, but I'd like to thank you for reading and reviewing, it's appreciated!

I will have this story finished before the season 8 premiere on October 3 and if I can manage it with my schedule I hope to be done by September 30.

Happy Reading, I hope!

**When All Other Lights Go Out**

**Chapter 6: The Bonds that Bind**

By Dawn Nyberg

"_There is a beast in man that needs to be exercised, not exorcised_."

Sam felt the air around him like fingers gently combing his exposed skin and the sounds of distant dogs barking filled his ears, his senses were suddenly very acute and alive. His memory went to a farm he passed over a mile back coming to this old and forgotten cemetery, a farm where two large Labradors were running around and he realized he was hearing them. There was a bite in his stomach he couldn't place at first and then realized it was the hunger, the hunger to feed. He knew if he fed on a human he wouldn't be able to be saved, but he was more focused on getting to his brother. There was a rustle in the trees and Sam turned as his ears picked up a heartbeat, not human, but animal, he could hear the blood coursing through the animal's body. He licked his lips and felt his fangs descend and he crouched low, animalistic, he was a predator now. He ached for the hunt, the pull strong. His muscles tensed ready to cover the distance and feed, but he dropped his head, closed his eyes and focused.

He thought of his brother and getting him out of Purgatory and he found the inner strength he needed. His fangs pulled back up and he stood up as he ran a hand through is hair. "I'm comin' Dean just hang on a little longer," Sam murmured as he approached the stone steps leading to the gate into Purgatory. He took a deep breath and ran the palm of his hand across the jutted out rock blade and drew blood. He turned his hand palm up and allowed the blood to pool in his cupped palm. He turned his hand sideways and allowed it to gather into the stone bowl shaped impression in the stone. He wiped the rest of his hand on one of his legs, staining his jeans with his blood. He allowed a moment to ponder the realization that his blood did have a unique scent, human and demon. It was an intoxicating blend even to him. He turned and faced the door and just when he began to think it wasn't working he heard a click and the large door unlatched and swung wide. He saw darkness but could smell something on the other side waiting and he had to be ready. He walked in and a few steps in the door the closed behind him.

"So, we goin' or what?" Dean whispered as he crouched next to Benny as they over looked the valley.

"The valley is full of things that would rather kill you than look at you," Benny started. "You better be ready for that because I'm not getting my ass killed for you. I'll leave you, you know that right?"

"Wow, you're all heart aren't are you," Dean groused. "I can take care of myself and believe me I will leave your ass, too." Benny looked at the weapon Dean had spent the last day making. They had been stuck up on the alcove longer than they had wanted but the field below was just too active. He was impressed with how resourceful the human was considering he was just a mortal.

"Your weapon looks like a fine piece," Benny offered the idle comment. "I'm impressed you found the blade to make that with."

"I didn't exactly find it, I took it," Dean said with a glint in his eye. "I can't help that rawhead's aren't very smart. He was alone and … well, I needed the blade."

Benny just lifted and eyebrow and said nothing. Dean clutched the almost sickle looking blade. It was a large wicked looking blade he had attached to some wood for an added handle and it appeared to be a mini-version of a hand-held scythe, but as Dean looked at it, all he could think was _how badass this weapon looked_.

Sam stepped out of the dark corridor and saw two cloaked figured each standing side by side facing the corridor. They were about five feet from the doorway. They each lifted a hand that was holding a weapon and pulled back their black hoods to reveal, white, bald heads, they had large eyes with red cat-like pupils and their mouths were pulled back far like piranha's and they had sharp teeth in long jagged rows, they looked viscous and Sam ran his catalogue of monsters and his vast knowledge came up with nothing. He didn't know this species. He was surprised when one spoke quite clearly to him.

A gatekeeper pointed at Sam and the other spoke, "you bleed … you bleed a master's blood, a blood of a first."

The second guardian's eyes narrowed and he took a long drag of the air as if trying to decipher Sam's scent. He cocked his head slightly to the left. Your blood may be mixed with that of a first but your blood is also that of Azazel." he sniffed more strongly. "I smell the Morning Star on you."

The gatekeeper's partner hissed and drew back, "you're the boy king," they looked on Sam with undecipherable appraisal.

"I'm not any king, Azazel is dead and Lucifer is back in his cage." Sam bristled at their appraisal. His eyes narrowed and his fangs descended, "is my passage granted," he stood at his full height and the guardians who Sam was sure could kill him if they desired dropped their eyes at his unspoken challenge.

"You may pass, but your return is not promised as there are those in the Valley of Nex that will seek to rend you apart."

Sam's fangs withdrew and he nodded walking past them and wasn't surprised to see them also watching him as he turned to look at them, but they had already returned to their posts on each side of the doorway to leave. He saw a similar mechanism to the side that he had used to enter. He was about to ask a question when the wind picked up and he caught a scent, a familiar one and it made his heart climb into his throat. It was faint but real nonetheless, he smelled his brother. He carried a gun tucked under his shirt and jacket loaded with consecrated silver rounds, and the demon killing knife. He reached into his boot and pulled out a silver blade and walked with a purpose. He wasn't sure what creature or monster he would run into here but he tried to cover his bases. He had a big brother to find.

Sam evaded attacks by keeping to the fringe of a forest that bordered a broad valley that he assumed was the Valley of Nex. He could still detect his brother's scent, it wasn't strong but he was still able to track his in the direction of Dean. "Sam?" the voice had him spinning and his eyes going wide.

"Lenore?"

"What in the hell are you doing here?" The vampire looked at him and then she stepped back. "You're a vampire," she stepped closer and smelled him. He rolled his eyes, what was with all the smelling going on down here? It made him feel like an animal and with a sickening clarity he began to understand, he was an animal, a beast now even as he clung to the vestiges of his humanity. "You carry the blood of the Alpha in your veins," she answered.

"You're okay," came Sam's surprised response. "I mean after … you know…"

"After your angel friend killed me," she offered a mild smile. "I was glad it ended for me, but …"

"But, you didn't think this was your future, right?"

"Not quite," Lenore looked a little feral, however, her goodness still showed behind her eyes but she was harder edged now and Sam didn't doubt for her to have survived here she was a very adept killer. "Your transition isn't complete," Lenore offered as she studied Sam. "You haven't fed on human blood yet."

"No, I …"

"Why are you here Sam?" Lenore interrupted Sam.

"I'm here to find my brother."

"Dean?" She looked at him confused then her eyes narrowed. "He's the human down here that I've heard whispers about?"

Sam puffed a small laugh, "figures Dean makes the headlines down here. Have you seen him?"

"No, but I've heard the human has done well for himself or I guess Dean has done well for himself."

"Is he alone?"

"Are you asking if that angel is with him?"

"Castiel," Sam offered.

"I had heard that there was an angel with him but word is that they split up … I'm guessing they wanted to cover more ground looking for a way out." Sam nodded. "Of course, there isn't one unless you're an Alpha or were turned by one. "Wait," her voice incredulous. "Did you get turned by the Alpha for the sole purpose of getting in here?" Sam remained silent. "You did didn't you … how were you ever that stupid?"

"He'd do the same for me," Sam defended. "I wasn't bitten he gave me his blood to drink. There's an old family cure that will work as long as I don't feed. I know it works, it worked on Dean last year."

Lenore just looked at Sam stupefied. Then her gaze traveled upward as a shadow began to grow over the ground. "It'll be dark soon, it's not safe out here unless you want a fight. You should find some shelter."

"I need to find Dean. I can smell him in the wind."

"Yeah, well, trust me, his ass hasn't survived here without knowing when to hide it. You haven't had a night here yet, have you?" Sam shook his head. "Look, I owe you for that time when you saved me from Gordon, so you can stay with me tonight but when the light comes you're on your own got it?"

"But…"

"No, but," Lenore interjected. The shadow grew larger and the light was slipping away quickly. "Move your ass … trust me you're not finding your brother tonight. Now, come on."

"We'll stop for the night," Benny said as he inclined his head toward a group of heavy brush and trees that hid a small hidey hole. "This will have to work for the night."

"We didn't get very far," Dean groused. "This is gonna take freakin' forever to reach this damn gate."

"You complain a lot," Benny said as he moved toward the shelter of trees and brush.

"Whatever," Dean answered irritated. "Damn I thought the only person that could get me from zero to pissed this quick was my brother but I gotta say you might be winning."

"Brother?"

"Don't," Dean warned. "He's not a topic I'm discussing with you."

"Younger, huh?"

"Up yours," Dean's tone wasn't amused and Benny easily detected the protectiveness in his tone. He hunkered down turning his back on Dean as the darkness fell across the ground and watched the darkness for any possible attacks.

"Keep alert we're in the belly of the beast now. This is the heart of the Valley of Nex."

Dean said nothing but watched the darkness, too.

The light had come what felt like hours ago and Dean was surprised that they seemed to be making great time toward the gate, but he couldn't let go of the idea that this was suddenly way too easy. They hadn't been approached or attacked since they left their hiding spot from the evening. Benny had had nothing but a few words to say and had been quiet since they were back on foot and moving through the valley keeping the cover of the nearby forest trees within in running distance if they came under attack. Dean had no real desire to talk to the vampire anyway.

Sam had left out at first light still following the scent of his brother he would catch on the wind. Lenore had wished him luck and left him, although she had still called him dumbass for turning himself and coming into Purgatory.

Benny lifted a hand and Dean stopped he could tell Benny was listening with his increased hearing ability. He turned and looked at Dean, his voice low, "we're not far from the gate now … be ready."

"For…" and Dean never got to finish his sentence as six enemies came at them, and Dean quickly recognized what they were, he yelled at Benny, "Rugaru's!"

Dean had encountered a rugaru twice in his life, Jack Montgomery and the rugaru that he and Sam had turned over to demons when Crowley was in search of how to access purgatory. Dean hated thinking about the short time he had allowed himself to essentially become Crowley's bitch when he thought Sam's soul was the prize.

"No fire," Benny yelled as he fought, "decapitation works!"

Dean remembered that he and Sam had discovered the way to kill rugaru's was fire but seeing as they had no flame throwers around, he was glad at least chopping their head off worked, too.

Dean was knocked to the ground and the rugaru was on top of him lunging for his neck but Dean brought up an elbow and knocked the creature in the jaw. They still sort of looked like men but their skin was almost worm-like and their faces had long lost their human appearance. He found and opened and was able to use his short knife to drive the four inch blade into the creatures neck, a deep stab and he pulled out. The rugaru reared back and made a sound that resembled an almost guttural human scream. Dean had enough time to roll away and find his footing before the rugaru was coming at him. He looked over at Benny and the vampire had only succeeded in killing one and the others seemed to be tag teaming rather than a pack attack.

Dean took a blow from the back as another entered the fray. He was knocked to the ground and rolled over bring up his large bladed weapon in defense. He could see that Benny was on the ground and trying hard to not be ripped to shreds by the two rugaru's that had him pinned as a third moved in. Dean had his hands full with the final two. He knew this was bad. The pair was on him in a second, his weapon knocked a few feet away and long fingernails gouged Dean's arm as he tried to block another attack for his neck. His own blood was hitting him in the face has his arm bled. He was kicking and trying to protect his neck and then suddenly he watched as his blade came into view for a splint second as it met the neck of the rugaru trying to bite him and his head flew and rolled away as its body fell to the side to twitch a bit. There was flurry of activity as hands came down and pulled the last rugaru off of Dean and tossed him aside.

There was a streak of movement as two more rugaru's lost their heads leaving on one for Benny to deal with and then the streak of movement came back and stopped. Dean saw this new ally block the last rugaru and then there was a brutal fight. The new ally that Dean couldn't see the face but the glimpses he caught reminded him of … _nah, no way_, was all he could think. The rugaru got in a lucky strike as it swept an arm upward and came up behind the new ally and long nails dug deep and ripped, shredding jacket and shirt. Deep red saturated the fragments of clothing and the unknown ally raged and went after the rugaru with swift speed.

Benny stood by Dean now as he wiped the rugaru blood on his pants. He'd been able to kill the last creature after his attackers were thinned out. He recognized the supposed new ally with indifference, he could smell his own kind, this was a vampire and not just any vampire this one carried the blood of an Alpha, but something was different about his scent that he couldn't pinpoint but he also knew this was a vampire that had never fed on a human and oddly enough that made his blood smell very edible.

The final rugaru died in a spray of blood as his head was ripped from his shoulders like a beer lid being popped off a long stem bottle. Their help turned eyes and fangs easily giving way to the fact it was a vampire but what Dean was seeing he couldn't wrap his head around. There were blood stains on the vamps face and blood still flowed from the wound the rugaru inflicted.

Benny could hear the increase in Dean's heart rate, he understood, "you recognize him?"

"No, it can't …" Dean was in a stupefied shock as he stared at what clearly under all the dirt and blood was his little brother. "You're some freakin' shifter, playing bloodsucker that just looks like my …" he stopped himself as the fangs receded and all Dean saw was his little brother, his hurt, bleeding little brother, but he still didn't move.

"Dean," Sam's voice was breathless as he took a tentative step forward.

"No," Dean murmured. "You're not my…"

"Dean, it's me, okay, look I had to get in here man and this," Sam lifted his lip to show his brother the recessed fangs, "was the only way man. Look, I haven't fed, I promise. I have the family cure ready and waiting when we get out of here. It's me Dean," Sam asserted gently. He went to raise his arms in supplication but hissed as a moan broke free when he felt the flesh on his shoulder and back rip a little further causing new blood to flow. Benny licked his lips and suddenly Dean's big brother protectiveness filled him.

"You make a move on him and you'll be dead before you hit the ground," Dean's warning brooked no argument and Benny thought for a moment that even if Dean was not a physical match for him in strength he actually considered Dean a mild threat. Sam took a step forward but the world swayed and before he knew it the ground was rushing up but the impact never came, instead he felt the warm arms of his big brother come around him. He felt Dean embrace him as they knelt in the dirt. "I missed you, little brother," Dean whispered into Sam's ear as he held tight.

"Me too," Sam breathed out. Dean felt the soaked clothing and his hands came away bloody. His stomach turned at how this reminded him of that moment in Cold Oak when he Sam died in his arms kneeling in the mud.

"Sammy," Dean's voice caught. "We gotta stop this bleeding. You're bleedin' like a stuck pig."

"I'm okay," Sam's voice was quiet and not at all reassuring. Dean turned hot eyes toward Benny.

"I thought you bastards healed quick," Dean accused.

Benny backed up a step and puffed out a snort, "You act like I did this to him. He's the one that should have watched his six." Dean looked at Benny and his eyes seethed at the vampire.

"I've seen you cut and you healed within a couple minutes, he's not healing what the hell is wrong?" Dean looked at Benny and at Sam.

"Dean," Sam tried to stand but Dean held him in place against him.

"No, Sammy, stay still. Dammit you're such a dumbass for doing this … I'm so going to kick your ass when you're healed." Sam huffed a laugh against his brother.

"That's what Lenore said."

"Lenore? Are you shitting me you ran into her here?" Sam just nodded and before Dean could say anything else Benny spoke up.

"He hasn't fed," Benny started. "Feeding on human blood is what brings us full circle when we change. You're a vampire from the moment of exposure but it isn't until you feed that you fully become …"

"Sonofabitch!" Dean barked. "So, what you're telling me he's not gonna heal."

"No, but it'll take longer than …" his voice dropped off.

"Longer than what?" Dean's brow creased in concern.

"Well longer than he has … I can smell his blood and he's losing a lot. He'll bleed out long before he can heal. Unfortunately, feeding is what also seals our immortality. He will die."

"No," Dean looked stricken. Dean was already pulling off his over shirt and making a pressure bandage. "I can stitch this Sammy, okay. I just need some supplies. I got this under control, okay?" He paused a moment, "Where's Lenore?"

"Back that way, but she's gone you won't find …" Sam's voice drifted off and he collapsed fully against his brother. He was unconscious.

"Sammy!" Dean barked, his voice was urgent but garnered no response. He worked hard to slow the bleeding and tried to inspect the wound. There were three deep scratches that dug deep into tissue and muscle. "Dammit Sammy, you're a mess," Dean grumbled.

"He's got the blood we need to get out of here Dean. We won't have to take on the gatekeepers. He has free passage to come a go with the blood of an Alpha."

"So, what you're willing to help because he's your ticket out of here?"

Benny shrugged, "so, this Lenore she's a vampire I take it."

"Yeah, but …"

"I'll be back," and Benny was gone.

It was two nights before Sam stirred and when he opened his eyes he was in a cave of sorts with a dim fire burning in the corner. He was propped on his side and wrapped in some fur skins. "D …" he coughed his throat dry and a hand was there instantly lifting his head and guiding his mouth toward a flask filled with water.

"Shh, drink, okay." Dean soothed. "You've been in and out of it for a couple days now. "You lost a lot of blood but Benny says the vampirism is starting to help a little."

"How'd…" Sam had no solid memories just flashes.

"Long story Benny found Lenore and she was able to get me what I needed to stitch you up and left."

"Did you say we've been here a couple days?"

"Yeah, why?"

"We need to go Dean, you don't get it topside a couple days down here is like a week man. I left the car there and …"

"Calm down Sammy, you became a freakin' vampire dude and walked into purgatory to find me … I may love my baby but the car will wait. You gotta heal up."

"Dean," Sam's voice was stronger. "I have to get back, I …"

"He's hungry and Dean you're on the menu," Benny offered at the mouth of the cave.

"Who are you?" Sam questioned. "Dean, why'd you hook up with a bloodsucker?"

"Watch your mouth boy … anyway, who are you calling a bloodsucker, we're the same."

"No, you've fed on humans in the past before here, I can smell that on you … I haven't and Dean," Sam made sure his brother was looking at him. "I won't hurt you, I won't …"

"I know that kiddo. But …"

"No, we have to go, its light out we have to go. How far are we from where I found you?"

"Not far," Dean replied.

"Good, then we're not that far from the gate. I'm getting you out of here."

"Us, you're getting us all out of here," Benny's voice was strong.

"You belong here my brother doesn't." Benny moved like lightening and had Dean by the throat.

"I'll kill him without blinking. We were headed to the gate before you came along. This little partnership is getting us out of here. Now, with you as a free ticket we don't have to take on the gatekeepers.

A couple hours later, Sam struggled with the walking but the trip back toward the gate was going off without a hitch. There had been no attacks and he wanted Benny dead but he would kill Dean just to spite him. Dean walked next to Sam and kept a steadying hand on him when he stumbled now and again. "We could stop for a while Sammy," Dean offered with a worried look on his face.

"I'm okay Dean, we gotta get out of here before the darkness comes again." Dean knew the truth in that and they continued.

After what felt like another hour they reached the area that was before the gates. "So, we're here," Benny said his voice low. "It's time … you do this," Benny warned Sam his eyes shifting from him to Dean. "No double cross." Benny sneered. "You've got no intension in taking me out of here do you?" Sam just looked at him. "Fine, there is one more way," he grabbed Dean by the throat and shoved back throwing him several feet and before Dean could gather his senses Benny was on Sam his fangs descending and sinking into Sam's neck. Benny drank deep and hard and pulled away his fangs dripping and his face bloody. He drew the back of his hand across his mouth and licked his fingers. "Well, boy you're just finger lickin' good. I got my get out of jail free card." Benny looked over at Dean. "Adios, catch you on the flip side." He let go of Sam and he crumpled to his hands and knees. Benny was gone in a flash.

"Sammy!" Dean ran and slid to his knees. His hand pulling away his brother's as he covered the fang wounds. "Dammit."

"I'm okay," Sam's tone wasn't convincing Dean, he was pale and sweaty. "Dean, we have to hurry, I can't …"

"I know, I know Sammy, I remember how hard it was not to feed. I got your back bro'."

"Sorry, I let that happen to you back then," Sam answered under his breath.

"It wasn't you Sammy," Dean assured. "Just soulless Sam and he wasn't my brother." Sam offered a weak smile. Dean helped Sam up and kept an arm around his shoulders.

The exit out of purgatory was about as anti-climactic as an exit could get Dean mused a moment. Sam had been given passage and Dean was allowed to go with him. Benny was long gone, Dean hoped. The cool night air brushed their faces and the fresh air felt, so damn good that Dean took a moment to close his eyes and relish it. "Dean," Sam's voice held pain. "Please, we have to …"

"Tell me where the cure is Sammy, I'll go get it."

Sam told his brother and he was off and running.

Dean handed Sam the bottle, "you sure?"

"What are my options?" Sam's voice was weak. "I have to …"

"I ain't stupid Sammy I know this cure can either fix you or kill you."

"Only way Dean," Sam raised the bottle to his mouth. "No matter what I'd do it again," he assured and he drank the nasty concoction and waited. It only took a couple long moments before he was retching and writhing on the ground and Dean kneeled close by but not too close as fangs descended and receded and Sam screamed. The screaming turned to moaning and Sam arched violently off the ground and collapsed boneless to the ground, his eyes closed and now Dean felt fear as he tried to focus in the dim moonlight, he couldn't even tell if his brother was breathing, his fingers shook as he reached down and pushed in on the pulse point on his brother's neck … searching for life.

**To Be Continued**


	7. Still Waters

**Disclaimer:** The characters of "Supernatural" were created by Eric Kripke and are owned by the CW Network. No profit is being made.

**Note to Readers: **Well, this is the last chapter of the story and I hope it's enjoyable. It could have been longer but I really wanted to have it concluded before the October 3 premiere of season 8. So, for better or worse this is it.

I have some more fic ideas brewing, but for my next story I plan to have at least 3 or 4 chapters done before I start posting, so I can stay ahead in case my schedule gets packed. Many thanks for the reviews and PM's. Also, thank you to all the readers that leave review's as a 'guest' and don't sign in. I'm not able to thank you by PM, but I'd like to thank you for reading and reviewing, it's appreciated!

Happy Reading, I hope!

**When All Other Lights Go Out**

**Chapter 7: Still Waters**

By Dawn Nyberg

"_Wait, your tired arms must rest let this moment pass, wait until the morning …"_ lyric excerpt ~ Janis Ian, _When Angels Cry_

It felt like some sort of distant nightmare to Dean when he thought about his time in Purgatory. He was down there for months and had left Sam alone. He watched Sam's chest rise and fall artificially with the will of the ventilator and his eyes filled as he thought how his little brother risked so much to get to him, to save him.

He sat vigil at his brother's bedside where he had since he'd pulled up to the nearest ER from the old frontier cemetery they had emerged from a week ago. He idly read the hospital mission statement that hung on the wall near the opening to Sam's ICU cubicle, "_We provide hope through advanced care for our patients and families." _Dean's eyes went back to his little brother and leaned forward taking his hand and holding. He squeezed and silently thought he needed that mission statement to be true because Sam was hanging on by a thread and he needed some hope … they both did.

**One Week Earlier**

Dean sat in a treatment room where they had insisted on treating his clawed arm while Sam was treated in an advanced treatment room for critical care. He had convinced them that they had been camping up by the old cemetery and playing amateur ghost hunters and they had been attacked by an animal in the dark outside in the surrounding woods. The doctors had looked at Sam's scratch injuries and had told Dean they were pretty sure it was a Black Bear that had attacked them. Dean had only said it happened so fast and there was a growl and no real warning. So, now he sat in a treatment room and looked at his bandaged arm that had needed cleaning and had showed signs of infection starting, but they had given him some IV antibiotics as he waited in the treatment room. One doctor had come in and asked about the stitch job on his brother and he'd simply said they were really far put and he needed to do something.

Now, suddenly he and his brother were mini-celebrities in this small hospital that survived a few days in the wilderness after being attacked by a bear. Dean didn't care about any of it, he just wanted his brother to be okay, but he so clearly wasn't.

They had taken Sam off to the advanced trauma room and he'd only been given brief updates as they had fought to save Sam. They had wanted to admit Dean but he'd refused because that meant being separated from where Sam was and he refused to leave the ER.

When the update had finally arrived that Dean was waiting for from one of the doctor's treating his sibling he almost wish he hadn't. Sam was on his way to surgery to fix some of the deep tissue injury and fix some vessel damage. His blood loss was critical and the bite wound to his neck, although the doctor had said the bear must have only got a small portion of its fangs into Sam before Dean was able to get it off his brother there was some deep penetrating damage that needed fixed by a vascular surgeon they were having brought in by helicopter from a larger hospital seventy miles away. Sam was in hypovolemic shock and they were aggressively treating him with blood and fluid replacement. Sam's respirations were poor on arrival which Dean knew when he had raced the Impala through back roads with Sam after he'd taken the cure. Sam's breathing was so shallow that Dean had placed his fingers near Sam's mouth and nose to feel the shallow exhale. There had been a bit of blue tinge at the corners of Sam's mouth when they pulled up to the ER entrance.

Sam had stopped breathing in the ER, so he was now intubated and Dean's mind reeled at the list of issues: respiratory arrest, extremely low blood pressure, low body temp they were trying to get up, his kidney function was decreased, his cardiac output was low and they were aggressively treating him.

Dean's mind came back to the present and he looked at Sam who hadn't stirred in a week. "Sammy," Dean's voice was hushed, it was late in the ICU and Sam's room was only one of four cubicles in the small hospital. "You can't save me and check out that's not how this works, okay?" Dean ached watching the ventilator breathe for his little brother and he hated that red light that glowed brightly that said 'Mandatory' because he knew his little brother wasn't taking any breaths on his own. Every day he hoped to see a flicker of 'Assist' light up meaning Sam was trying to take breaths on his own. There were still multiple IV bags hanging around his brother, filled with medications to help his brother's blood pressure and cardiac output. Sam was slipping away and Dean could feel it.

"Mr. Smith," the voice was one Dean knew pretty well by now, it was Sam's physician, Dr. Highting and Dean turned his head toward the man at entrance to Sam's cubicle.

"Call me Dean doc," he replied. The older doctor smiled.

"Sorry, I keep doing that don't I?" Dean offered a small smile that didn't reach his eyes.

"It's okay, how's my brother doing?"

"His blood counts are rising but we are still dealing with the problems that the extreme hypovolemic shock has created. He isn't rebounding as quickly as I would like."

"What's that mean?"

"As I've mentioned in earlier conversations this week, Sam's heart is still having trouble with output and requires IV medications to help it pump more effectively. His blood pressure remains an issue and he is unable to maintain it on his own without drug support. His kidney function isn't where I'd like it." The doctor paused a moment, "Dean," his voice softened.

"Don't," Dean's voice suddenly strong. "I'm not pulling the plug on my little brother, he can beat this."

"Dean," the doctor pulled up a rolling stool that was along the wall and sat down in front of Dean. "We're doing everything we can, however, there comes a time when hard decisions may have to be made." Dean turned his eyes toward his brother.

"He wouldn't give up on me, I'm not giving up on him," Dean's voice was definitive and told the doctor to tread lightly. Their conversation was interrupted by the wail of a monitor and it seemed Sam was once again trying to help his brother out by making a decision his big brother couldn't and Sam's heart stopped.

Dean was pushed from the room as staff descended on Sam. He stood stock still outside and watched his brother rolled to his side as a board was put under him, his ET tube disconnected from the vent and an ambu bag attached as the gave his brother's breaths as rescue efforts continued.

"We got nothin'," a young resident said as he looked to Dr. Highting for guidance. The staff moved in sync each person doing what they had to in order to try and get Sam's heart beating again.

"Let's get some epi on board," Dr. Hightings commanded. "Continue compressions."

The efforts seemed to go on forever to Dean as he stood outside watching. They had tried to get him to step outside the unit but he wasn't leaving his brother. "What's his down time," Dr. Hightings asked.

A nurse looked at the running resuscitation clock, "seven minutes." The doctor shook his head and went back to work.

"Dr. HIghting's," the resident asked as he continued compressing Sam's chest.

"Stop compressions let's see what we have," the doctor instructed. The young resident stopped compressing but left his hands in place.

"Okay, we've got a V-fib, let's shock him," everyone stepped back. "Clear!" Dean watched the paddles applied to his brother's chest and saw Sam's chest arch slightly from the defibrillation. The doctor looked at the monitor and shook his head, "okay, let's go again, charge to 275, clear!"

Long minutes later, Dean seemed to only just that moment notice that Dr. Highting's was standing in front of him looking grim and he was talking. "What?" Dean asked, suddenly all his attention on the doctor obstructing his view into his brother's cubicle.

"I said, we got his heart beating again, but…" the doctor began. Dean checked out for a moment at that statement and then brought his attention back to the physician.

"But, what," Dean asked.

"He was down almost ten minutes," the doctor began again. "His heart arrested despite the medications we're using Dean."

"What are you saying?" Dean's eyes were scared.

"I think you might want to consider comfort care at this point for your brother. We are doing everything we can, but his condition isn't stabilizing. He has been critical since he arrived and we have only been just staying ahead of the curve with him, but I think with this latest episode we are losing ground quicker than we're gaining."

"Then try harder," Dean barked. "Sammy's fighting as hard as he can, so you do your job and help him fight. He can beat this … I'm not losing my brother."

Several hours later Dean sat next to his brother. Sam was pale, his skin almost porcelain-like. Dean tried not to think back to that time in Cold Oak, his brother's skin looked the same way, but this time was different, Sam was alive, the monitors said so, his heart was still beating. "Sammy, listen to me, okay," Dean began his voice low, just for his little brother's ears. "Look I know you're tired Sammy, I do. But, you can't check out on me not like this. I need you to fight, I need you to do it now," Dean commanded softly in his brother's ear. "They think I should let you go, but that ain't happening … you hear me. You can't quit." His voice choked, "please," his big brother bravado slipped away suddenly as he looked at his little brother, and knew he was slipping away. "Please, Sammy, don't leave me, I need you kiddo. I need my pain in the ass little brother, okay?" he waited and couldn't stop a hand from reaching up and pushing back his brother's long hair gently and then allowed his hand to rest gently on the side of his brother's head.

Dean fell asleep in small snatches of time too afraid Sam would slip away, but he still clung to life and Dean had no intention of letting him go anywhere. Dean stretched in his sleep chair and sat up. He got up and sat in the chair next to Sam's bed, "I know it's late Sammy," Dean started and glanced at the clock, "it's 3 in the morn' but I had somethin' to say and I don't think I said it before. Now, don't read into this," his voice was low. "I still think you were a blue ribbon dumbass for doing what you did to get me out but thanks little brother, I'm damn proud. So, please don't let this beat you or it'll be my fault," Dean offered. "So, stay, okay?" Dean rested a hand on his brother's forehead, "so, I'm going to back to sleep but I'm right here," he assured and went back to his sleeping chair.

Shortly, before dawn there was an odd random beep or two from Sam's vent that had Dean awake and sitting up, as if on auto-pilot. He stared hard at the vent settings and one thing was different and suddenly he felt excitement and anxiety when he noticed that the 'Assist' light was glowing. "Sammy?" Dean was on his feet instantly. He turned and went to the opening of his brother's cubicle. "Kara," Dean kept his voice low in lieu of the time. Kara was Sam's night nurse. She brought her head up from a chart.

"Yes," she asked standing. "Do you need something, Dean?"

"Sam's triggering the vent, I think," Dean's voice expectant. Kara looked surprised as did some of the other nurses at the station.

"Let me take a look," she offered lightly. When she walked in she expected to see no changes but it was reading 'assist' and that couldn't be denied. She did a couple more tests and then turned to Dean. "I'll have Dr. Highting paged, he wanted contacted day or night if there was any changes in Sam's status."

"So, this is good, right?" Dean moved from one foot to other. "He's taking breath's on his own, right?"

"It appears he is Dean and a couple of my tests were positive, so I'm going to page the doctor," Kara replied with practiced ease. She didn't want to give false hope but she didn't want to kill his hope either.

"But, this is a good sign, isn't it?"

"It's a good step," she answered. She could give him that much at least but Dr. Highting would be the final say on Sam's status.

It was three days later, and Dean hadn't felt this light in almost a week and half. Sam was still in the ICU and unconscious but he was off the vent and was turning a corner. The doctor and the staff were a little in awe and honestly a bit stupefied that Sam was fighting back. He had begun to really rally a day and half ago. His cardiac output was improving and his blood pressure was holding as they reduced his support medications. He had a nasal cannula but it beat to hell that damn vent, so Dean was thrilled.

On the evening of the fourth day, Dean had fallen asleep leaned back in the chair next to his brother's bed with his hand on Sam's forearm. When he felt a gentle pressure on his arm, he figured it was a nurse encouraging him to lie down on the sleeping chair, but when he opened his eyes he saw his brother's hand and looked up and met eyes with his little brother. "Sammy?" his voice excited and low as he stood up. Sam looked at his brother. He could see the heavy stubble which indicated days of no shaving and the dark smudges under his eyes that spoke of many a restless night filled with worry. He blinked slow as his mind tried to play catch-up and try to remember his last memory. "Sammy, you know where you are? You're okay, man … I'm here," Dean's words rushed in his excitement.

Sam looked around the room and back at his brother. He saw the bandaged arm on his big brother, "y'all right?" his voice a quiet whisper but it was the best sound to Dean's ears. He huffed a laugh at the question. Leave Sam to worry about a friggin' bandage on his arm while he's hooked up to monitors and tubes in an ICU.

"I'm good Sammy, it's you I've been worried about."

"Hospital?" Sam asked as he looked around.

"Yeah, you're going to be okay. It was touch and go for a while but I told them you'd make it." Sam tried to follow his brother's words but he was so tired and his eyes kept dipping closed. He felt his brother touch the top of his head and when he tried to open his eyes again Dean just slid his hand down resting it over Sam's eyes. "Sleep Sammy, I'll be here. We'll talk later. Rest," it was a quiet command full of safety and love and Sam for once followed his big brother's command without a question and went back to sleep.

Sam was discharged after another week and half in the hospital and now Dean just wanted to get his brother somewhere safe and quiet to finish getting his strength back. He was still weak and didn't have a lot of stamina just yet, but Dr. Highting had assured them both that he'd be back to 100 percent in another month or two. Sam had bounced back from the edge and the doctor had said that Sam had renewed his belief that maybe medical outcomes weren't always cut and dry.

"Where we headed?" Sam asked casually as he sat next to his brother in the Impala as they got on the highway. Dean had kept Sam in town after being discharged for a final follow-up and to have his stitches removed by Dr. Highting before leaving town and now they were finally leaving. Dean looked at his brother and smiled.

"I was thinking Sheriff Mill's for a while. I called her when you were in the hospital and she wanted to come out, but I told her 'no' but she wanted called with updates …" Sam interrupted Dean.

"She was there for me after you were gone, she's a good person Dean."

"I know."

"Did you call her Sheriff Mills?" Sam gave him a knowing smile and Dean laughed.

"Yeah, and she chewed my ass a new one, told, me to call her Jodie or she was going to kick my ass."

Sam smiled and laughed and it was music to Dean's ears, "and she could so kick your ass Dean," Sam confirmed.

"You too, princess," he answered playfully. Sam smiled. Dean looked at him for a moment. "Why don't you grab a nap Sammy, we'll stop for some food in a little bit I'll wake you up."

"I'm good Dean," Sam assured.

"Okay," Dean was hesitant "but if you feel tired don't fight it, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah," Sam humored him.

"I told Jodie we'd be there in a couple days." Sam just nodded and looked out the window at the scenery. Dean looked at him. "You feelin' okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good." Dean returned his eyes to the road ahead and after a few minutes of comfortable silence with only the radio playing he decided he needed to say something.

"Sammy?"

"Yeah?" Sam looked at his big brother

"We haven't talked about that purgatory vamp stunt you pulled you know?"

"I'd do it again," Sam's voice was quiet but he looked at Dean his gaze not wavering and Dean saw his brother for the man he'd grown up to be and he felt pride swell.

"Yeah, well, you pull that crap again like that and I'm gonna kick that Sequoia tree ass of yours into next year, deal?" Sam chuckled.

"Deal," Sam replied with a dimpled smile. He knew there'd be more talk about what happened and probably about Benny but he'd wait until Dean brought it up.

Dean looked at his brother, "okay, deal," Dean agreed easily. "Why don't you pick a channel for us to listen to," Dean offered and Sam looked surprised. After all, the rule he'd grown up with seldom changed: _Driver picks the music and shotgun shuts his cakehole_.

"You sure," Sam asked.

"Yeah," Dean answered and looked back out at the road and when the channel stopped on a song Dean just looked at his brother, "Sam," the tone warning and Sam just laughed as _Chicago's _"You're the Inspiration" played loudly on the Impala's radio.

**The End**


End file.
